We've spent a large part of the last couple days packing my friends stuff for her to move back to Vancouver after the break up. It's hot today and raining. We packed and cried and drank far too much without feeling a buzz. I'm sure we have all been there and know how sick you feel. She has lost five pounds at least in the last couple of days. I have hardly eaten either. The break up contact down I guess. But hey, I really needed to blow off a few pounds.
My old old pal from college days who we used to get high and talk about the meaning of life and everything and sometimes hang on the beach. Middle of the night rain storms on the west coast and run outside into the sprinklers on boulevards on Vancouver Island found my blog!!! I posted his name somewhat randomly ina a post a couple of months ago in the hopes he would google his own name and he did and found my blog! Yippeee! What fun to catch up after many years. We last saw each other in Manhattan at a surprise birthday party for him...and lost contact. It has been an incredible treat to make this reunion and to catch up on our lives and what has gone down. We were crazy club bunnis and trippers and art and philosophy junkies in our youth and people like that become so symbolic and valuable and treasured as time goes by.
I must run now. We need to take these bunch of boxes...a persons objects of their passions and interests and life to the bus station and ship them. Thank god for friends. It is sad and seems so destructive especially when wouldn't it make more sense to really talk about a break up as much as a romance with the person you love. Some people are shut off from their emotions and their accountability and I think that is a real tragedy.
I give thanks for having feelings and excitement about this life and the idea that is is an ongoing journey...hopefully with more learning at every turn, hopefully with a lot of funny episodes and fall down funny moments...that somehow there might be a feeling of it making sense or at least some layers of meaning amongst the turmoil. I know there is deliverance. I know if there is no method or the universe might collapse or civilization implode or we blow ourselves to smithereens...it is the times that we love and share that make it gorgeous. Who cares if there is a god or not...we may never have that kind of closure. But we make our own justice and our own karma. And we have the choice to make it ROCK!
Must run...love, and lots of fucking hilarious laughter at the lilas!