To Kevin "it's a guy thing"

Kevin said, "I think it's just a guy thing you're not entirely getting, Candy. Aden said stuff to swim against the tide and some guys respond with exaggerated attacks. He insulted Shakespeare and claimed Milton was better, for god's sake. How could I let that pass, I ask you? Back and forth is what guys do. Doesn't mean we couldn't all sit down to a brewski together. Look at President Barry the Cambridge Cop and the Harvard Professor. Classic. It's just practice."

I do get that it's a guy thing. I've read Iron John. I understand when David Mamet says "Women have, in men's minds, such a low place on the social ladder ... that it's useless to define yourself in terms of a woman. What men need is men's approval."

I appreciate you saying it's a guy thing Kevin, and I understand that male bonding and male mutual approval is incredibly important to a lot of people. I respect male bonding and female bonding and various activities that often need dialogue in order to prevent misunderstandings between ocial constructs. But...I reject the idea that we need to maintain some kind of gendered space or gender sanctioned or segregated behaviours here at this web site bookclub for Cormac McCarthy. I appreciate that since it's a "guy thing" you accept that you and Aden, or Aden and Rick, or Aden and some other guy are "back and forth is what guys do". Well, in my world women do it too. I don't have any particular aim to worry about being one of the guys or not. I send it back and forth with the best of them, regardless of whether I am one of the guys or not. And I've drank plenty of beer with the same people I've sent it back and forth with.

Which is my original point. Why are you suggesting I ignore Aden's posts if I don't like what he says? You have confirmed that it's because you believe it's a guy thing to go back and forth...therefore I should just ignore Aden and not go "back and forth" with him because it's a "guy thing".

You say I should ignore a post I don't like or such because it's "just the internet". I get that, I realize for a lot of people the internet is different than other social arenas. I am sure it is, for some people... but for me it's not quite lke that...you defend your position by saying you could have a brewski with these "guys" here at the forum after going "back and forth". Well so could I. I have in fact. I've made friends and lost friends at this "internet". I've drank brewski's with internet relationships. Gee...just like a guy. I've had brewski's with guys I've had knock down discussions with here at this very forum and other "internet" sites. I agree that it's unwise to take bookclub discussions too seriously...or to take a difference of opinion as a reason to not enjoy a beer with a fellow human. I do get that. More than get it, I live it Kevin. Being on the internet isn't an excuse for me not to take human contact seriously or with pleasure or with dissonance. Being on the internet isn't an anonymous behaviour for many of us.

I'm all for the guy thing...but I reject your idea that in this bookclub and internet web site I should ignore posts I don't agree with but the guys don't have to. Because you say "back and forth thats what guys do". I appreciate you being honest with your feelings about gendered space. I appreciate you being honest with your feelings about guys going back and forth versus the behaviour of a woman also going back and forth. I suggest that you re-evaluate your opinion about womens behaviour here at the forum.

And besides, how would I know if you were a male or female and in fact, "a guy"? And that your belief that guys go "back and forth" is not rendered more authoritarian to me either way. I reject your definitions and standards of telling me I should ignore Aden's posts, or anyone's posts if instead...I'd rather go "back and forth". Going back and forth has nothing to do with gender.

You say "some guys respond with exaggerated attacks." And why should that exclude me responding "stern"? According to you ...because "it's just a guy thing you're not entirely getting, Candy.". If you have a problem with my gender going "back and forth" I suggest you either mind your own business about how I talk to others here at the forum...or you take up your gender issues regarding who and how I talk to and who I don't with the forum suzerians.

John Hughes, R.I.P.

We've lost one of the best storytellers.

Not only did John Hughes write some of the funniest movies of the 1980's, he might have written some of the most beloved characters in film. Period. I don't know how many times I've watched Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Or She's Having A Baby. Or The Breakfast Club. And I damn near died laughing...on many occassions...with Planes, Trains and Automobiles.

John Hughes made movies when we last all still went to the movie theatres.

I think he was as good a writer as Charles Dickens. And like Dickens he was able to represent how it felt to be a little too young or a little too oppressed to be quite able to live up to the responsibilities our society imposes on us. While making us laugh at our selves and fall in love with our selves. His movies are absolutely perfect. Only a month ago I happened to crawl under a big blanket on a Sunday afternoon and watch Ferris Bueller's Day Off and enjoy a classic Hughes set of prat falls, conflicted leading characters and a bulls-eye emotional pay off.

A John Hughes movie had it all. And he had it all in the communal setting of a theatre and the enduring memories of generations of us who could quote the best lines and dance like Molly Ringwald for a stunt. I don't know if I had a girl friend who wasn't in love with Judd Nelson.

Not only did Hughes create movie stars out of his casts he made Chicago a movie star. Almost all of his films were set in Chicagoland and it's hard not to spend time in Chicago and not run into a place, a house or location that has been made monumental and timeless by a Hughes mise en scene.

If you're at the rental store in the next few days...pick up Planes Trains and Automobiles and give yourslef a great big belly laugh. It's a genre-bending buddy flick and has a wonderful love story between John Candy and Steve Martin...in many ways foreshadowing the bromances of Judd Apatow.

"Those aren't pillows"


A comedic tribute to John Hughes for an awards show in 1991.

Hey Mr. D.J.

Fun!

Happy Again

Happy Again

This is a video of a wonderful song with a friend of mine. See her playing drums! I've seen Scott Free play live and he is a terrific performer. One of the things I like about this video is how it is partly psychologically intense but also quite funny. I like how the lovers are seeming to play with the stereotype of "she just lies there". One lover seems to be "just lying there"...which goes against another stereotype of gay sex as being wild and primal and off the chain. The body movements of the singer are going with the pulsing beat and over-all the cinematography and scary sense under the surface of this video reminds me of David Lynch. I think there is a lot going on in this video and it's quite inspiring with it's mysterious narrative.


Help get my friends music video played on LOGO! LOGO is a television programmmer for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Tv shows and specials. At first I'd heard a rumour that LOGO wasn't able to play this video because of the sexual content. I think they have underestimated the viewers who wll understand there is a lot of film history references going on here, some sexual stereotypes being toyed with...and that it s actually all good clean fun!

You can help LOGO decide to play this video by voting for it's release!

Here is the link...all you do is scroll down and click the dot at "Happy Again" Scott Free and Friends...then fill in your name location and e-mail aaddress. You can vote a lot of times.

Please click here to vote!

Melt Banana: the Accessible Noise-A Week of Noise #6

Melt Banana is a Japanese noise band playing almost 2o years. The music kind of invites the question..what is the difference between punk and noise? Especiallywith Melt Banana because they still mess a lot with melody. The ore noise you listen to the more you can find yourself looking for the melody. It's almost a great exercise in testing your own music senses and also rejecting everything you think you know about music. Noise is really the frontier of say music for music lovers. Noise is..."Musicians for musicians" if you will. Actually. click here and listen/watch a beaufitul performance of Melt Banana with Jello Biafra performing a Dead Kennedy's song "Government Flu".

Metal Machine Music-A Week of Noise #5

The Melvins

Metal Machine Music