Stress-Relieving Philosophy

Uriah Heep by Fred Barnard

There are some people in the world who are desperate. You can find a number of these folks on the internet, or at work, even at church, and they are so obsessed with being "liked" they write or speak every thought in mitigated speech. You know, cloying and on the fence. They never really say what they think and they trie to cover "all sides" of an argument...that way everyone will like them. They long to divide and split those who oppose them and to win a popularity contest or the favours of greed, power or attention. This person is just a cleverly disguised shit. So is the woman who fucked over my poor dad. She acts like Martha Stewart, even naming one of her cats Martha Stewart, she smiles and was sickly fat trying to pass as cozy and warm. A Martha Stewart from hell because everyone in her life got sick, kind of like Munchausen's. She was just a cleverly disguised shit. Or what about those people who have always done it better and sooner than someone else? Someone at work tells an anecdote about having a good Italian meal...and then there is that guy, he's had it in Italy. With a Count, in a castle, ten years ago, made by a woman with a five hundred year old secret recipe. You know the type. One upping type. A cleverly disguised shit. We've all gotten sucked into the games of these vampires at one time or another.

You know what, they are like Charles Dickens character Uriah Heep. I watched a BBC porduction of David Copperfeild a couple of weeks ago and was wowed by how he had portrayed these shits so well in that character.

You can find these shits all over the world and their sole purpose is to be a dream smasher and to shit on others. It is hard to remember that we should just laugh to our selves and walk the fuck away. Do not lose sleep over a shit. William Burroughs really understood this...

"Burroughs explicitly linked his philosophy to Manichaeism-a third century Persian religion. Manichaeism was founded by a young preacher, Mani in the early to mid third century of the common era. Mani was heavily influenced by Gnostic Christianity-calling himself a "disciple of Christ" and the Paraclete", or biblical healer. The Manichaens incorporated many existing belief systems into their worldview. From Manichaenism and Gnosticim, they appointed a strongly held belief in cosmic dualism. It is in this sense that Burroughs links his philosophy to that of the third century religion. Burrough's fiction and nonfiction work (as the two are not readily separable) are best characterized as mythology. He himself described his effort as writing the mythology for the space age. His philosophy has many parallels to early Gnosticism that go beyond this simple invocation of Manichaeism dualism.

Burroughs first encountered the concept of the Johnson Family while still a boy reading the book You Can't Win by Jack Black. First published in the 1920's Black's autobiographical account of hobo life was immensely popular in it's day. Burroughs describes the Johnsons in The Place of Dead Roads:

"The Johnson Family was a turn-of-the-century expression to designate good bums and thieves. It was elaborated into a code of conduct. A Johnson honors his obligations. His word is good and he is a good man to do business with. A Johnson minds his own business. He is not a snoopy, self-righteous, trouble-making person. A Johnson will not stand by while someone is drowning or trapped under a burning car."

In his essay "The Johnson Family" Burroughs elaborates on the Johnson's philosophical placement within his mythic system-explicitly linked them to Manichaeistic dualism:

"The Johnson Family formulates a Manichaen position where good and evil are in conflict and the outcome is at this point uncertain. It is not an eternal conflict since one or the other must win a final victory."

In contrast to the honorable world of hobos and criminals, Burroughs describes a type of person known simply as a "Shit". Unlike the Johnsons, Shits are obsessed with minding other people's business. They are the town busy body, the preacher, the lawman. Shits are incapable of taking the honorable road of each-to-his-own. Burroughs describes the situation in his essay "My Own Business" thus:

"This world would be a pretty easy and pleasant place to live in if everybody could just mind his own business and let others do the same. But a wise old black faggot said to me years ago: 'Some people are shits, darling.' I was never able to forget it."

In Burroughs mythology, the world is one of conflict between the Johnsons and the Shits. A Shit is one who is obsessively sure of his own position at the cost of all other vantages. Burroughs describes Shits as incapable of minding "their own business because they have no business of their own to mind, any more than a small pox virus has." This is more than an offhand analogy. For Burroughs, Shits are, in actuality, virus occupied hosts-chronically infected by what he terms the Right virus. "The mark of a basic Shit," Burroughs reminds us, "is that he has to be right."

The war between the Johnsons and the Shits is an epic one that runs throughout Burroughs writing. Though of immense proportions, like the Gnostic battle between good and evil, the cosmic war is not figured across eternity. It has an end and, for Burroughs, that end is imaginable. It does not come without immense conflict, however. Burroughs tells his reader, "The people in power will not disappear voluntarily." There is no turning back, once the battle is met. "Once one take up arms against a bunch of shits there is no way back. Lay down your arms and they will kill you." Hell hath no vociferous fury than an endangered parasite." And remember, "The wild boys take no prisoners." "full article here